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The Right Story of a Wrong Knot – Part 1

Guest post by Tanya from Braindeadmusicalive!

Give it up for our guest blogger and a great friend Tanya for her first blog with us 😀 *applauds*

Marriage is not just a spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash.

“My husband and I have never considered divorce… murder sometimes, but never divorce.”

Married life.
It’s a roller coaster ride!

Yes, that’s hilariously true about so many of us who are in the married life! But who cares!? We are all here to create our own “Happily ever after” stories.  And why not, the adrenaline rush you get from the idea of spending a life time with that one person is the wildest and the longest adventure one could live on the face of this earth. Voila! Luckier you get, when the one you marry doesn’t fit into your idea of the perfect one. More often than not, that is the ideal case.
Some days you’ll find yourself bursting into tears not knowing if the decision was ever worth it. Some days you’d want to lock yourself up and let the usual complaints, the un-said fights and hourly frustrations go unnoticed. And on the other not-so-cruel days, you’ve got your eyes beaming with love that comes from the one whose standing right by your side, holding your hand, making a million promises of a trillion years of togetherness. The one moment of silent but magical sigh, has the courage to survive yet another life time.
Without getting carried away with the flawless possibilities of falling in love with the right one, let’s try and see what the wrong one’s are all about. The ones who are yet to get hitched and the one who’ve already been there, done that, would both agree with the fact that a real time married life  happens not when you tie a knot or do the rituals, but when you leave the bed early in the morning and bit by bit see yourself trying to blend in the new, emotionally challenging, nerve wrecking changes that have been tied  to you just as much as the dreamy thought  of a never ending honeymoon did.
There’s no one way to fix a problem, this is to say that there’s never going to be a straight outlined guideline, or a simple answer to any of the varying but similar issues of marriage. You’re idea of a relationship is completely yours, so are your ways of dealing with it.  Chanting examples of how did your neighbor manage a divorce out of a failed marriage or how the recent survey shows  that marriages have lost value in recent times wouldn’t help you feel better or sort matters.
Coming from an unwed-brain, these are some of my quick and personal views that wouldn’t help you sustain a marriage longer than you already can, but might just help you add a bit of spice to the idea of making your companionship a better, funnier and easier tradition to live by… (To be continued in part 2, up tomorrow )
You can follow Tanya’s FB page here.
 

26 thoughts on “The Right Story of a Wrong Knot – Part 1

  1. Story of every one, someone or the other have faced this situation atleast once in their life, though I’m not married yet but it happens most of the time I feel the same way with my 5 year old relationship (boyfriend) whom I’ll be marrying soon but life is about moving on with the person you are in love with, no matter what ups and down you face, lovely post Tanya.

  2. A clear candid depiction of the Gospels of Marriage.
    Wanted to pen down my own personal notion of the issue. I don’t know, but I’m bumping into the topic more frequently these days than it was ever, ironical in a sense coz it is only now that I’ve put in conscious effort into understanding the phenomenon (?).
    Statistically, bad marriages and the other incompatible variants are there in our part of the world as much as terrorism is being in somewhere else, or unemployment and poverty being in the rest of them. So much like, how people still succumb to ailments attributed to smoking with the government pumping crores into issuing statutory warnings, similarly despite people discussing marriage related issues with benevolence and compassion, nothing literally seems to change. And the reason could be, lack of coherence. We, as a society have closed all the routes to escape out of an incompatible marital relationship, because we’re yet to learn to accept the personal choice of an individual to be who one is, with veneration.
    The flip side is even grimmer. Some of us are so in so much of hurry that they won’t give it a second though to chop up the tree even before it bears flower. Confused state of priorities in marital life can many a times poison the rest of the life, left to simple rot with time without respite. There may be umpteen number of reasons but the pivotal one that I see is beyond everything else, is compassion alone…
    And the most disturbing one is, while spouses would be weighing their options and subsequent moves, a kid would be hiding itself behind the wardrobe, with trillions of neurons firing violently to seek some respite in its tiny brain, sensing the silence before the storm,
    … taking the “roller coaster” ride with them with all inhibitions and might, with a fervent wish in its heart, to stay with its “parents” for eternity enough.

  3. @Sid-d-kid 😛
    Mymy!! :O Your comment is more of a 3rd part extension to my blog 😛
    Thank u for expressing your candid yet stunningly bold views on marriage. Hmm it seems you’ve given it a lot of thought and woah! feels good to see at least one man trying to read beyond the soft surface 🙂
    “And the most disturbing one is, while spouses would be weighing their options and subsequent moves, a kid would be hiding itself behind the wardrobe, with trillions of neurons firing violently to seek some respite in its tiny brain, sensing the silence before the storm,.”
    Beautifully put, I can relate to it n makes me wish that the roller coaster turns out to be a fun-ride for all.
    🙂

  4. Its such a big challenge to leave the comments on the blog/online article, the idea of leaving your email address & getting [email protected] is more scary than the hullabaloo of marriage.
    Marriage never does what it promises & it never did in the previous generations as well. But so is true to any relationship., so why take marriage so seriously.
    My point is don’t give much fuss on choosing the partner or how to get along with the person of your adverse nature, just get married and move on in life. But yes keep on exploring the exit route, if it is way too much to handle.
    Personally I am endorsing the concept of marriage because i don’t get a damn house in Mumbai being a single, which i hope to get post marriage.

    1. 1. Why consider commenting at all, when spamming bothers you ?
      2. Personally I am endorsing the concept of marriage because i don’t get a damn house in Mumbai being a single, which i hope to get post marriage.
      — is like, I’m willing to study medicine because it comes with the prefix Dr. before the name.

      1. @Moon!
        haha! You’ve got sum nasty revert from my brainy Sid there 😀
        @Your valuable feedback – ummm not that I dint know all of dat awready buh you have just managed to make me believe, that’s the lack of some better enriching experiences doing the talk of your flat-finding version of marriage. 😛 Nevertheless, do not worry, I’ll make sure u find ur flat and a permanent flat-mate ASAP! 😛 😀

        1. @Tanya See i have been spammed here also 😉 Take it easy Sid , at least you have a nice name .

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